Rating: NC-17 [LEMON]
Section: One, Two, Three
Summary: When words and time create a distance between two beating hearts, Yoochun and Junsu must decide if their love can be resurrected from the ashes of their pain.
“Do you know what sorrow is like, Susu-ah?”
Yoochun’s fingers sought out the softness of the man’s hair, stroking at the silken strands falling over his forehead. They lay nearly nose to nose on the bed, their bodies close enough to feel the heat of the other against their skin. The shower washed the night’s stains from Yoochun’s body and Junsu filled his lungs with the masculine scent he’d once associated with affection and love.
Junsu couldn’t speak… didn’t dare to speak. They’d drifted too far from the comfortable companionship they’d once had and the feel of Yoochun’s hand in his hair was a welcome comfort. He shook his head, a minute little movement, unable to take his eyes off of Yoochun’s soulful brown gaze.
“Sorrow… it’s like smoking a cigarette.” Yoochun’s attention drifted, falling into a familiar dreaming state Junsu knew all too well. The young man often fell away from reality, reaching far down into himself for words to express his emotions. “It’s a habit, something you do because there’s something deep inside of you aching for it. It hurts. It burns when you inhale it in but it’s a recognizable pain. The problem is the same though. It leaves you unable to taste anything in life… not its real taste. Everything is made slightly bitter and ashen because the sorrow’s stained your tongue… your mind so anything you eat… anything you feel… tastes like sorrow.”
“How do you quit…sorrow?” Junsu whispered.
“Where you are concerned, I can’t,” The man admitted softly. He blinked, his long lashes sweeping shadows down over his cheekbones. “Without you, my world is always going to be bitter. I’ll never be able to taste anything ever again without the sour bitterness of my heart’s smoke. You see… when you left me… I traded one addiction for another. My addiction to you, my Junsu-ah, was replaced by my addiction to sorrow. And I cannot shake it. No matter how hard I try, it grips my guts and my heart until I cannot stand the pain and its taste.”
Junsu’s eyes, already swollen from the tears he’d shed, stung sharply when they watered again. Biting at his upper lip, he leaned into Yoochun’s palm when the man’s hand ghosted over his cheek. Yoochun’s strength resonated in his hands. Long-fingered and broad, they knew every inch of Junsu’s body…knew the secret places, when touched, made Junsu purr. The tenor ached to have those hands on him again.
And he ached even hard to have those lean fingers plunge into his warmth to make way for Yoochun’s hard sex.
When Yoochun’s mouth touched his, Junsu closed his eyes, shutting the world out. He wanted to feel the man against him without any blinding him to the sensation of Yoochun’s callused hands on his skin. Strong fingers gripped shoulders and Junsu was pulled into Yoochun’s chest. His gasp opened his mouth and Yoochun plunged in.
A lightning storm bloomed between their lips. Junsu moaned when Yoochun’s tongue traced his lower lip, tipping down inside the space between his pout and teeth. The rough of the man’s tongue against the tenderness in Junsu’s mouth set his skin on fire. Junsu leaned into the kiss, angling his head to get his lips pressed closer against Yoochun’s. The fire stroked through him again and Junsu was lost.
The stubble on Yoochun’s upper lip rasped over Junsu’s cheek when the other man bit into Junsu’s firm jawline. His teeth scored Junsu’s tender skin, only releasing the bite when Junsu moaned softly. Tilting his head back, Junsu rolled over onto his back, inviting Yoochun to do with him as the other man pleased. His shirt slithered from his lean body and Yoochun’s clever fingers found his nipples, tweaking them softly while Yoochun nuzzled the sweet spot where his neck and shoulders met. Yoochun’s leg hooked over his, pinning Junsu down and he writhed, needing more of the man on top of him.
When Yoochun bit savagely into the spot he’d just licked, Junsu whimpered.
He screamed when Yoochun’s mouth found his nipple and bit harder still.
His lover’s tongue lashed at the tiny nub, the peaked point captured firmly in the clench of Yoochun’s sharp teeth. His other nipple was tortured as well with the scrape of Yoochun’s nails, his fingertips raking at the point until Junsu was certain he couldn’t stand much more of the exquisite pleasure. His body sang under Yoochun’s touch and it took him a second to realize the hand over his chest was gone. When it reappeared at his waistband, Junsu arched his back up and begged Yoochun to take him.
“If we do this, Susu-ah,” Yoochun growled. “I’m not letting you go. We’re not going to part again. No matter what happens between us. You’re going to be mine again. For once and forever, my Susu.”
“I can’t live without anything else,” Junsu whispered, lifting his head to stare into Yoochun’s hot gaze. “I cannot live without…this…without you.”
The room’s chilled air hit Junsu’s bare skin and he hissed at its bite on the scrapes Yoochun’s nails left on his thighs when the other man pulled his pants off. His erection sprang free, its head already damp with his arousal. The tip rubbed against Junsu’s stomach, leaving a silvery trail of seed on his taut belly. Straddling the tenor’s thighs, Yoochun stared down at his recaptured lover, his hands moving slowly over Junsu’s hips.
“I cannot live…without this…without you either,” Yoochun rasped and leaned over to lick up the trail left by Junsu’s sex.
Suckling on the man’s skin, he followed the moist line, licking at the salty path until he reached its source. Rigid and unyielding, Junsu’s erection lay firm against his belly, bobbing softly as Yoochun moved. Pursing his mouth, the baritone slid his tongue out and toyed with the pearled slit then slid Junsu’s crown past his waiting lips. His fingers slid down to the young man’s taut sac. The skin across the orbs were tight and Yoochun could feel them moving when he cupped Junsu’s balls in his palm. The heat of his hand released the sweet musky scent of Junsu’s hidden masculinity and Yoochun couldn’t resist giving the man’s head one last suck before leaning down and laying a gentle kiss on the treasure he held in his hand.
“I miss kissing you here,” Yoochun whispered. Pressing his lips against the tender skin of Junsu’s inner thigh, he murmured softly, “And here. I miss kissing you here too.”
“Need you, Chunnie-ah,” Junsu gasped. His fingers were tight on Yoochun’s shoulders and his arms were taut, his muscles coiled and primed from his arousal. “It’s been too long. Please. I cannot…”
“Don’t come yet, baby,” Yoochun ordered. “I want to be inside of you when you do. I want to feel you around me when you lose your control.”
“It’s been… so long, Yoochun,” He pleaded, his hips moving in time with the fingers stroking at his entrance. “I don’t think I can…”
“Do it for me, agi. Do it for me.”
He dipped his head down and wet his lover’s crinkled opening with his tongue. Pressing his finger against the rosy pout, Yoochun laved again, moistening the way for his first joint. Junsu’s body went stiff and he cried out, breached for the first time in months. Tightening the fingers of his free hand around the base of Junsu’s sex, Yoochun staved off the orgasm threatening to rip from the man’s arousal.
“I don’t have any… oil here, Susu-ah,” Yoochun murmured. “I will have to go to the bathroom to…”
“Don’t want to wait, agi,” Junsu gasped, left breathless while Yoochun rotated his finger around his entrance. “I can’t…don’t leave me like this, Chunnie.”
“I can’t… I don’t want to hurt you.” Yoochun slid his index finger further in, pressing himself against the hot moistness of his lover’s body. “This isn’t… this won’t hurt but I’m… too big for just…from my mouth.”
His own erection threatened to spill just from the hot velvet feel of Junsu’s core around his finger and Yoochun couldn’t swear that he wouldn’t lose release the moment his crown touched Junsu’s entrance. With the young man writhing on the bed under him, his sex ached and throbbed, the pain of his want filling him. The flush on Yoochun’s face spread down his chest and over his arms, a chilling heat that collected in his belly and at the base of his spine. His desire was beginning to consume him and if he didn’t find something to oil his lover’s body soon, he would take Junsu where the man lay and damn the consequences.
“Yoochun…” Junsu growled when the man pulled free and scrambled to reach the night stand at the edge of the bed.
Under a stack of music sheets, Yoochun found what he was looking for, a small tube of lavender unguent he’d bought to moisten his chapped hands while on set.
“Turn over, Junsu. Now.” Using a firm hand, he hooked his fingers under Junsu’s side and pulled up. Yoochun kissed the rise of Junsu’s hipbone as the man slowly rearranged himself. “I’m going to ask you this… not because I’m jealous but because I need to know. Have you been with anyone else after me? Anyone?”
“No. No one since you.” Junsu bit back the wrenching sob threatening to break free from his heart. He knew why Yoochun had to ask… knew if either one of them had strayed, they could go no further without protection but the question still hurt even as he heard Yoochun’s whisper.
“Me neither. There’s been no one… could never be anyone…but you.”
The cream was cold against the heat of Junsu’s opening and he hissed when it touched his skin. Yoochun’s fingers quickly spread a warmth through the lotion and he worked it around the man’s entrance, slowing his touch when he pulled down against the pucker’s tightness. Soon Junsu found himself raising slightly up on his knees and spreading his legs further apart, his soft groans wordlessly begging Yoochun to enter him.
“I’m going to take this slowly, Susu-ah,” Yoochun promised. “Don’t touch yourself until I’m ready to let you. Keep your hands at your side.”
Junsu clenched the bed sheets as Yoochun tucked a fat pillow under his belly to ease the stress on his legs. Sinking into the welcome softness, Junsu twisted until his cock lay down against his hip. The rough fabric on his tender sex was enough of a stimulation to keep him aroused and he knew if he could keep his movements shallow, he wouldn’t lose his release before Yoochun came inside of him.
In that moment, Junsu realized what he wanted the hot spill of Yoochun’s seed in his guts more than he wanted to come himself. Moaning, he lifted one hand to bite into the plump of his palm, hoping he could stave off his desire long enough to feel Yoochun inside of him.
After Slathering the cream over own his sex, Yoochun prepared Junsu for his entrance, working another lavender-scented finger into his lover’s depths. Junsu struggled under him, straining to stay still while at the same time, pressing back onto Yoochun’s intruding fingers. He longed for Yoochun’s thick, long shaft and the baritone’s murmuring encouragements while Yoochun stroked his lower back enflamed his want for the man’s body over him.
“Yoochun! I need you to…” Junsu whimpered, gasping hard as Yoochun widened the gap between his fingers and scissored Junsu’s entrance open. “Aaahhhh….”
“Now, baby. You’re ready for me,” Yoochun whispered, pulling his fingers free of his lover’s heat. Bending forward, he kissed Junsu’s shoulder blades then trailed his tongue down the long dip of Junsu’s spine, thrilled at the shuddering want shaking through his lover’s body. Gripping himself tightly, Yoochun guided the tip of his sex against the tight heat of his lover’s entrance. He pushed in, straining against the muscular ring until Junsu gasped and surrendered.
Yoochun took his time, inching his way into Junsu’s velvet softness until Junsu could no longer stand being still. Forced to hold Junsu down, Yoochun spanned his broad hands over the base of Junsu’s spine and pinned him to the mattress, working slowly into the long channel. His fingers bit into the man’s hips and he worked his thumbs back and forth over the small of Junsu’s back, soothing the shivers working up from Junsu’s breached core.
They found a rhythm quickly, their bodies moving first against one another and then with the flow of their dance-tuned muscles. The hard muscular ass Yoochun admired fit against his own hips and Junsu’s pale ass cheeks dimpled when Yoochun pressed his fingers down over their plump forms. Pulling up sharply, Yoochun changed the angle of his shallow thrusts.
Dragged up to rest his weight on his shoulders, Junsu turned his head and pressed his cheek into the bedding, inhaling the lingering sweetness of his lover’s scent in the sheets. Unable to do anything than ride the coursing pleasures raking through his body, Junsu wrapped his fingers into the bedding and spread his legs, begging with nonsensical murmurs for Yoochun to drive in harder…deeper…begging for the man to take him to a peak he’d never reached before.
Their bodies grew damp with sweat and Yoochun’s hands dug deeper into his lover’s muscles to keep his hold on Junsu. Shifting one knee forward, his cock hit the small bump he was looking for inside of Junsu’s body and the young tenor screamed, unable to stop his desire from springing up from his chest. Yoochun slid over the gland again and again until the lightning shockwaves pulling over Junsu’s nerves were no longer discernible and the young man trembled with the power of his burgeoning release.
Unable to do more than tighten his body around Yoochun’s plunging sex, Junsu gasped and twisted in Yoochun’s hands as his sex erupted its spill over the pillow under him. Another few thrusts and Junsu shuddered, his skin suddenly alive with sensations he couldn’t comprehend. It was only when he felt the hot liquid of Yoochun’s arousal did he realize he’d hovered at the peak of his release for the entire time Yoochun filled him.
Kissing his way up Junsu’s damp body, Yoochun reluctantly slid free from his lover’s heat. Using Junsu’s discarded t-shirt to clean the young man’s body, Yoochun tossed it aside then pulled Junsu close. Wrapping his arms around the man’s chest, Yoochun nestled his stomach up against Junsu’s chest, his flaccid sex fitting naturally into the crease of Junsu’s cheeks.
“I love you, Yoochun,” Junsu whispered. Bending his head forward, he kissed Yoochun’s wrist, feeling the strong beat of the man’s pulse under his skin.
“I love you too, Susu-ah,” Yoochun said. Pressing his mouth against the darkening purple mark he’d left on Junsu’s shoulder, he laid a gentle kiss on the bruise. “Know this, my baby…my love… I am never giving you up again. No matter what is between us, I will always come back here… to you.”
“I know.” Junsu blinked and a tear fell from his lashes to strike Yoochun’s strong arms. “And I promise, that no matter how often or how far I run, I will always let you catch me, agi. Because no matter where I go or who I become, I will always and forever be, yours.”