Pairing: Jaejoong and Junsu (and apparently Yoochun and Yunho)
Rating: LEMON WARNING
Summary: Junsu discovers an emptiness in his heart and is afraid the only person who can fill it is someone too broken...too afraid to be loved.
Sections: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six
For Ree, Scarletpeonies, Calyto and Maria...and anyone else who wanted a JaeSu.
Yoochun bounded down the steps to his front door with Harang panting at his heels. It was late, too late for visitors but he’d opened the door far later for a drunk Jaejoong wallowing in his unrequited mysterious love. Of course, if I’d known it was Junsu, I’d have told him to go for it and stop whining. Yoochun thought as he closed his hand on the doorknob.
Caution made him pause and look through the peephole. He’d lost his privacy nearly the day he moved in when the front of his house was photographed and uploaded onto fan sites. Even the refuge he found by sitting on the ledge outside of the upstairs balcony had been violated, the images of his writing and Harang’s curious stare often plastered across the net for people to see. Of the three members, he was the most exposed but Yoochun refused to let the intense scrutiny push him back into hiding.
This is my home. No one can take that from me. Not now. It’s not like America when we were poor and scared. This is my home, Yoochun scolded himself as he peered through the fish-eye peephole.
Then gasped when he saw who stood on the front stoop.
“Are you going to open the door for me, agi? Or do I have to stand outside until the sun comes up and the neighbours sees me out here like a beggar?” Yunho asked, staring back at Yoochun through the lens. “It’s freezing out here, Chunnie-ah. Open the door!”
The wind sliced into Yoochun’s skin and he turned his face away from the gusts coming through the open door, stepping back to let the older man in. Yunho hurried in, the hoodie of his sweatshirt pulled up over a worn blue beanie. His cheeks were pink from the cold and he licked his upper lip, moistening the chapped skin he found there. Stamping his feet, the man tried to shake some feeling into his toes, shivering on Yoochun’s threshold as Harang barked a short hello. The dog suffered a scratching behind his ear before he scrambled upstairs, heading back to the warmth of his own bed.
“Let me make you something hot to drink,” Yoochun turned, about to head back upstairs to the main floor. “You can warm up.”
“I can think of other ways to warm up,” Yunho replied, grabbing Yoochun by the arm and pulling him back to hold him against the closed door. “And they all revolve around you.”
Their kiss wasn’t graceful, not in the way romantic kisses are extolled to be but the sheer passion Yunho had for him touched Yoochun’s mournful soul. Their teeth hit, a cymbal crash of enamel and lust and their mouths slid about, trying to find purchase somewhere on the other’s flesh. Yunho’s tongue touched the tip of Yoochun’s upper lip and the baritone was lost, tilting his head back into the grip of the other man’s hands when they came up to cradle his neck.
Yoochun whimpered into Yunho’s mouth, torn between the pain of the man’s fingers carding through his hair and the pleasure of the man’s hard body pressed up against him. He ground his crotch into Yunho’s, aching to feel the other man’s skin on his. The rough scrape of his underwear on the sensitive tip of his shaft felt good but he knew it was not as good as Yunho’s hand would feel.
“Your mother?” Yunho whispered against Yoochun’s lips.
“With auntie in the country,” The other man murmured, pulling another hard kiss from Yunho’s mouth. “Dongsaeng is with them. He’s driving.”
“Good, then no one will interrupt us.” The older man turned Yoochun around and pushed him lightly down.
Yoochun tumbled back onto the short flight of marble steps leading up to the main floor, yelping more in surprise than pain. He fell without any grace, slamming one elbow on the edge of the cut stone and his legs flew apart, his heel slipping on the slick surface. The older man covered him, hands moving over Yoochun’s body until the singer couldn’t decide what was more of a torture, the man’s mouth or the stroking, pinching fingers that found their way under his shirt.
Yunho’s unshaven face left a slight burn on Yoochun’s neck, the stubble rubbing a rough burr on the man’s tender skin. A prickling trail would remind Yoochun of the path Yunho took over his body. His shirt tore under Yunho’s fierce grip, the worn fabric parting easily with a jerk of the man’s strong hands. The cold air pebbled his nipples and Yoochun gasped when Yunho’s tongue licked at one nub.
He screamed when the man’s teeth closed down on the nub and bit hard.
The singer writhed under Yunho’s weight, whimpering and mewling under the mouth taking possession of his body and the clever fingers stroking at the ties of his drawstring pants. A tug pulled the loose cotton trousers down and Yunho worked his way down Yoochun’s stomach, biting at the soft skin around the man’s navel. Yoochun lifted his hips, an instinctive need forcing him to surrender to Yunho’s questing mouth. When Yoochun felt Yunho’s tongue through the fabric as he traced around Yoochun’s hard length, he found the strength to tangle his own fingers into Yunho’s short hair, bringing a warning whisper to his lover’s throat.
“Put your hands down, Chunnie,” Yunho growled. “This time…this now, is mine.”
“Yunho-ah,” Yoochun whispered. “Please, I can’t wait.”
“Turn over,” Yunho ordered. “I’ll make you as ready as I can. I have some lube with me from the last time we… made love.”
Yoochun struggled to turn over, his legs rubbery from too much stimulation. Yunho’s strong hands bit into his hips, tightly gripping him but gently guiding him until he rested on his knees. The scrape of his pants being shoved quickly over his ass and then down to his thighs sent anticipatory shivers through Yoochun’s body.
The shiver turned to a tremble when the click of a lubricant bottle followed by the tell-tale scent of sandalwood and vanilla oil hit Yoochun’s senses. His world tightened in until the marble stairs existed in his mind, the honey stone cold under his hands and knees while the golden lights above them cast soft shadows of their bodies onto the floor.
Yunho rubbed the small of Yoochun’s back, silently soothing the younger man as he rolled his fingers around his oiled palm to warm the gel. Butterfly kisses down Yoochun’s spine was a soft brush of pleasure on his skin and he arched his back up, lifting himself up to meet the man’s mouth. Yunho’s tongue traced the spots before moving downwards then over to stroke at the singer’s side where a small scar from a childhood accident drew Yunho’s attention. Yoochun twisted slightly, laughing softly when the other man’s mouth touched a ticklish spot. Chuckling in response, Yunho kissed the spot again, biting at it without much pressure before rising up to whisper in his lover’s ear.
“Are you ready for me?” Yunho brushed at the delicate pink skin of Yoochun’s entrance, his slick fingers teasing the area with gentle circular motions. The long, low moan from Yoochun made him smile and Yunho brushed his lips over Yoochun’s jaw. “Let me hear you, Chunnie-ah. Make some noise for me.”
Lightly squeezing Yoochun’s testicles, Yunho rolled the man’s sac then reached up, easing the tip of one finger into the tight ring of Yoochun’s body. He hissed at the intrusion, then forced himself to relax, welcoming the man’s gentle pressure. Yunho pressed further in, reaching around his lover’s stretched out body until he could stroke at Yoochun’s sex with his free hand. The singer’s cock had softened slightly but with each long draw of Yunho’s fingers, it hardened and a pearly drop formed on its slit.
“God…” It was a drawn out plea, desperate even to Yoochun’s numbed hearing but the sentiment was sincere. His body needed to have Yunho in it. If there were a word he could use to beg the man to take him as hard as he could — until his body was as marbled with bruises as dark as the veins running through the stone he lay against — Yoochun would tattoo it across his chest.
There was a moment when Yoochun’s passage surrendered and Yunho knew it well. He waited until the tightness around his finger suddenly gave and the man’s body pulled him in. His own cock was hard, too hard and needy for Yunho to ignore. Releasing Yoochun’s shaft, Yunho undid his jeans and pulled his sex out of his underwear, reveling in the bite of elastic on his hips. His cock jutted up, a long spire thickened with want and damp from a kiss of his own seed at its tip.
Leaning forward, Yunho smeared his seed over the plump of Yoochun’s ass. The wet stain marked the baritone as his and not for the first time, Yunho wish he could leave something more of himself on the man’s slender body. Moving his finger up, he stroked at the small sensitive curve hidden deep in Yoochun’s passage, drawing out a shocked hiss from his lover’s open mouth.
“You’re…killing me, hyung,” Yoochun panted, bowing his spine to meet Yunho’s questing finger. “I need…”
“I know what you need, Chunnie-ah,” Yunho whispered, leaning forward to sink his teeth into the tip of Yoochun’s ear. “And I’m glad I’m the only one who’s given it to you.”
The scent of oil grew stronger and Yoochun groaned, his stomach clenching with anticipation. A slick sound echoed in his ears, a familiar rasp of Yunho’s hand spreading lubricant over the hot skin of his sex. Yunho’s finger touched the sleek spot in Yoochun’s core once more before he withdrew. With his body reverberating from the pleasure shocks rolling over him, Yoochun could barely whimper in protest at the emptiness in him.
Yoochun found his voice to scream when Yunho pressed the thick head of his cock against his entrance and pushed in.
It was always a shock to feel Yunho working to get inside of him. The man’s sex was thick and long, straining the tightness of Yoochun’s body each time they made love but the aching pleasure was something Yoochun knew he’d become addicted to.
Nothing could fill him like his lover’s sex and no one could touch him as deeply inside of his soul than Yunho.
Yunho eased himself in, drawing out slightly before rocking his hips. Yoochun’s body clenched him fully and he ached to bury himself into the tight velvet of his lover’s taut body but he held himself back, rubbing at the small of Yoochun’s back. The man’s half-drawn off cotton pants rubbed at Yunho’s thighs, tickling the skin with an erotic brush of soft fabric. His own jeans hung loosely on his ass, his leather belt dangling and weaving as he thrust his hips.
“Nearly in, Chun,” Yunho promised.
Yoochun nodded his head slowly, his mouth open as his breaths came out hard and fast. The long shaft pushing into him felt as solid as the stone under his hands and Yoochun couldn’t hold back the aching moan he held in when Yunho pulled his hips back. Yoochun felt his entrance cling to the man’s sex, pulling at the shaft in an attempt to keep the man inside of him.
A thrust of Yunho’s hips and Yoochun suddenly lost the ability to think.
Yoochun tried moving but his body refused to respond. Pierced by Yunho’s shaft, he could only concentrate on pulling air into his lungs and keeping himself from begging his lover to pound into him. His silence lasted as long as Yunho’s first thrust and then Yoochun screamed and pleaded until the older man pushed back in, stroking the pleasure centre of Yoochun’s body with one long, hard stab.
Their bodies grew wet with sweat and their throats began to ache from their growling pleas for satiation. The slap of Yunho’s exposed sac against Yoochun’s body set an erratic counterbeat to the pounding of their staggered heartbeats. The air was soon filled with the scent of hot skin and the promise of release.
Yoochun bowed his head and Yunho took it as an invitation to sink his teeth into the delicate flushed meat of the man’s neck. He bit hard, unwilling to let go of the scalloped piece of flesh on his skin. Sucking hard at the bite, Yunho gripped the base of Yoochun’s sex and stroked the man hard, pulling his palm over Yoochun’s soaking wet head.
Twisting in the grip of Yunho’s teeth, Yoochun mewled, crying at the aching tingle across his too-sensitive shaft. The rushing sensation quickly buried itself down into Yoochun’s sac and his balls tightened, pulling up to sit up against the base of his sex. Deep inside of him, Yunho’s sex pulsed and the older man shortened his strokes, desperately wanting to prolong the clench of Yoochun’s channel on his flesh.
The rush hit Yoochun without warning. One moment, he was riding the thrust of his lover’s shaft and in his next shuddering breath, his sex erupted in a stream of milky satisfaction. His vision closed in until nothing remained of his sight except for the pinprick of stars against black. His world spun outwards, his senses alive with the rush of stimulus around him.
In that moment, Yoochun felt himself everywhere and yet, pinned under the undulating weight of his lover’s body. His anchors turned inward; the rushing pain of Yunho’s teeth holding his neck, the pleasure of his body giving no surrender to the other man’s strength, the feel of the warming stone under his hands and knees and most of all, the stretch and pull of his entrance as it tightened around the base of his lover’s cock with the power of his orgasm.
The skin on his head felt bitterly tender and he nearly pulled back when Yunho’s fingers skimmed the spongy flesh at the end of his shaft. His sex refused to diminish and another rush struck Yoochun, boiling up from his sac and spilling out over Yunho’s cupped palm. Yoochun grew dizzy and struggled to find any bit of light but the night seemed to have filled him, nearly to the point of Yunho’s lovemaking.
“Breathe, my Yoochun.” At some point Yunho had let go but the residual ache of his teeth remained despite the older man’s hot breath ghosting over Yoochun’s ear. “Don’t forget to breathe.”
Yoochun’s shocked gasp forced cold air through his tortured lungs and the sweet smell of their sex poured into Yoochun’s chest. In that moment, Yunho’s warmth spilled from his man’s cock and rushed into the hidden recesses of Yoochun’s passage. Unable to stop himself, Yoochun came again, a small tremor rocking his spine and he convulsed, milking the remains of Yunho’s passion from his softening sex.
Yunho rolled over, taking Yoochun with him. The younger man feebly tried to protest but Yunho resisted his languid attempts to remain on his hands and knees. Settling down onto one of the steps, Yunho pulled Yoochun over him, cradling the singer in his lap, moving so Yoochun could sprawl out between Yunho’s spread legs.
For a few minutes, the only sounds in the vast apartment were their tangled gasps of breath as both men struggled to catch their wind. Despite the weakness in his satiated body, Yunho stroked at Yoochun’s trembling stomach, stroking through the kiss of milky seed and sweat on the man’s pale skin.
Yoochun sighed and the tension he’d been holding in seeped out until he lay boneless in Yunho’s arms. Leaning his head back on the man’s shoulder, he turned his face away from Yunho’s gaze. He knew he wouldn’t be able to keep the love he had for the other man from his eyes and in that moment, he didn’t think he could bear to discover it was not mirrored back. Better to keep his secrets, Yoochun though to himself, then to have his heart broken.
Yoochun stiffened when Yunho leaned his head forward and the man’s lips touched the damp hair on his cheek. Unable to do more than breathe, Yoochun lay helplessly frozen with shock as the older singer began to speak softly into his ear.
“I tried not to do this, you know. I tried not to want you.” Yunho’s voice was tight with restrained emotion and Yoochun blinked as the stinging pain of his tears clouded his eyes. “I knew what it would do to him — my wanting you, my wanting you like this when I refused to do this… one thing with him. I knew it would hurt him — it would hurt you — but I couldn’t deny this. I couldn’t deny you, Park Yoochun.”
“Tell me you love me.” Yunho exhaled hard, his heart as thick in his words as the sex they shared. “Tell me you love me as much as I love you. Tell me all of this pain has been worth it. Please, Chunnie-ah, tell me that your heart is mine.”
He’d sworn to himself that he wouldn’t seek the other man out but when night fell, Junsu found himself staring up at the mirror in his bathroom wondering what he was doing getting ready to hunt down the man who drove him insane.
Junsu dressed carefully, pulling on the pair of torn black jeans he’d taken from Jaejoong’s bags during their last tour. The seat of the pants fit him more snugly than they did the older singer and Junsu wondered if the battered denim would survive the night. Shucking the jeans off, he removed his underwear and pulled them back up. The jeans fit better although the soft brush of fabric on his bare ass and scrotum made him impossibly hard. Shifting his sex so it didn’t press up against the metal zipper at his crotch, Junsu shoved his arms into the sleeves of a snug black t-shirt he’d bought when he’d felt daring.
Standing in front of the mirror trying to put on eyeliner with shaking hands, Junsu felt as far from daring as never before.
The shirt’s fabric clung to his trim body as he rimmed his eyes in black. Although lacking Jaejoong’s muscular form or Yoochun’s sleekness, Junsu knew the hours he’d spent on the field toned his muscles enough to wear the lycra shirt and he hoped the thick soles of his boots would give him enough height to prevent the stolen jeans from dragging on the floor. A final brush of his fingers through his hair and he clenched the sides of the pedestal sink, staring at his reflection in the mirror.
“One last time, Kim Junsu,” He coached himself. “One last time to tell him you want him. After this, you’re going to walk away…and close this door behind you, forever.”