Pairing: Yoosu (Jaeho)
Section Rating: R
Overall Rating: NC-17
Synopsis: A continuation of the relationship between Yoochun and Junsu from So Much Mine. Once again, hot pretty boys, music, dancing and sex. Not necessarily in that order.
I will not be posting this fic every day like I did So Much Mine. I will make every attempt to do so but I probably will skip a few days once in a while. Please be patient.
I will update as often as I can. Thank you. Saranghae!
Leaning against the rooftop sill, Micky leaned his head back, inhaling the sweetness of spring lingering just out of touch in the night air. The bite of chill slipped past his hoodie, tracking goose bumps over his chest and stomach. Junsu’s voice trebled behind him, the tenor trying to show their youngest where a cluster of stars danced along the horizon, lit pearls that Changmin asserted was a plane landing in the distance. Jaejoong’s laughter echoed under Yunho’s deep chuckle, the taller man sliding his lover into an embrace. Neither heard anything around them, Yoochun was sure of it, Jae’s changeably cold face warm under Yunho’s rapt attention.
The night was perfect for lovers, crisp and smelling of burgeoning flowers lying beneath the surface of thawing snow. Tall trees provided a laced backdrop for the evening, a ridge of buildings jutting up from Seoul’s belly to surround the apartment’s rooftop with a trestle of steel and glass. Icicles crackled and snapped from power lines strung through open spaces, the fracturing white spines gleaming with captured rainbows.
Jaejoong and Yunho had no eyes for the beauty in the night, enraptured into the tangle of their emotions. Micky breathed a sigh of relief at their inattentiveness, able to watch the couple court one another openly with soft touches and gentle kisses. They would have little time to enjoy their couple-status, their faces on display with every step they took outside. Yoochun’s heart ached for their pain, wondering how the young men would survive in the tumultuous world that would batter at their love.
Worry creased Micky’s open face, an emotional tenderness filling his burnt-whiskey eyes. The taint of longing hung along the edges of Yoochun’s heart, battered from life’s hammering blows. His body’s needs were easily slaked, a charming smile tossed into a crowd of women usually peeled at least one out of the pack, but those flirtations and flings left him…wanting more… needing more and finding nothing that filled the void he’d discovered inside of him.
Yoochun’s head still turned at the sight of long legs and a short skirt but the willingness to trot after the girl faded, the effort to woo and coax her along paling under the companionship of the men he shared his life with. There wasn’t enough... substance, Micky found the word in his head, a meaty piece of thought to chew on. There wasn’t enough inside of the banter and giggles. Flirting was a diet of sweets, tooth-achingly numb that left holes in his bones when his stomach rumbled in hunger.
In a life so short, his world tumbled up and then down, turning in on itself...consumed in a fiery sea of change. He’d kept the reasons for his pursuit of stardom deep under a smiling face and a knowing wink, a playful mask over the seriousness of his soul. The loss to his heart ached, faces either dropping off from apathy or clouding under the mists of distance. The little brother he played with seemed a ghost in his memories, the wrought, anguish of his mother’s wringing hands sometimes haunting his dreams but Yoochun saw the remnants of pain in Jaejoong’s eyes, severed from the anchor of family and left adrift. Yunho weathered the storm battering his soul, sheltered and in turn, sheltering the wild, feral singer at the centre of their group.
Yoochun felt guilty for crying in the embrace of his friend’s arms, Jae patient and empathetic, understanding the loneliness that plagued the America-raised Korean. Compared to Jaejoong, his own pain paled in comparison but Jae never turned to Yoochun in pity, instead blossoming open and offering to allow Micky to reside in the warmth of his open heart, a gift the baritone treasured. In turn, Jaejoong held a solid place in Yoochun’s heart, filling in the cracked voids left from others tearing away, leaving crumbling shards of broken feelings for Micky to suck on for sustenance. And then, there was the curious agony of Junsu, the crinkling confusion leaving a messy trail of want in his chest.
“Ah, so serious!” Junsu nudged his friend with an elbow, nearly knocking Micky off balance. “Why the long face, Chunnie-ah?”
Junsu’s hands were always moving, a punctuation to his talking. Comfortable in his own skin, the young man stretched, fingers gesturing towards the baritone, mimicking a flat line over Yoochun’s mouth. Micky smiled despite his heavy thoughts, the lightening of his soul coated by his friend’s arrival. Offering Yoochun a lollipop, Junsu unwrapped a cherry sucker, licking the hard candy before lodging it into his right cheek. Taking the offering, Yoochun slowly undid the cellophane, sucking thoughtfully on the treat before answering.
“Just thinking.” Yoochun kept his voice down, not wanting to disturb the hyungs. Their world should be allowed to spin just for a few hours more in the nirvana they’d constructed out of paper snowflakes and gossamer kisses. The harsh reality of tucking away their hearts would return in the morning, hard edges and blunted on their souls. “Aren’t you supposed to be showing Changmin the stars? That telescope was heavy. Someone should make use of the wounds I earned dragging it up here.”
“Ah, our philosopher went downstairs to see if he can find something that depicts constellations. He doesn’t like the ones I’ve shown him.” Junsu rested his face on his friend’s shoulder, rubbing his cheek on Micky’s arm. Waving the lollipop in the air, he gestured wildly towards an smattering of pinpricked lights in the sky. “He doesn’t believe that there is a great elephant of the stars.”
“I wouldn’t believe you either.” Micky made a face, wrinkling his nose at Junsu’s easy lies. “He’s smarter that either of us...probably smarter than the two of us combined. What made you think he would believe you?”
“Who wouldn’t believe me?” The tenor batted his long lashes, a perfect mimicry of a helpless maiden from an ancient drama. “I can be cute. Cute can get you far, Yoochun.”
Junsu smelled sweet in Yoochun’s heart, a spiced kiss against the mint brisk in the air. Running a hand over Junsu’s hair, Micky wondered if the heat flooding his face was the result of the touch of the other on his body or the burn of the wind coming up over the rooftop. His hands itched to run over Junsu’s face, wanting the feel of the other’s soft downy cheek against the cup of his palm.
Those feelings surfaced more often than Micky cared to admit, the flushing tingle of the skin on his belly tightening or the roll of desire at the back of his throat. Watching Jaejoong cuddled against Yunho brought unwelcome thoughts to Yoochun’s mind, creeping hooked wonderings along the path of his musings. Swallowing away the thickness of his body’s response to Junsu’s touch, Micky hooked his arm companionably over his friend’s shoulders, willing himself to think of their close friendship…and nothing else.
“Man, it’s cold.” Junsu rubbed his hands together, using the width of his friend’s body to cut the wind from icing into his face. Burying his nose into the crook of Yoochun’s neck, the tenor grinned at his friend’s yelp of surprise. “What? You’re warmer than I am. I need to get the chill off my nose.”
“Aish! You’re cruel.” Yoochun reached around to rub at the spot, closing his palm over Junsu’s nose. The heat from his body leeched the cold off the singer’s face, a loose caress of warmth and comfort. Laughing beneath the mask of Micky’s hand, Junsu’s breath filled the lines of darkness with his bright smile. Cupping the rolling giggle into his palm, Micky pulled it free of Junsu’s face, bringing his fist to his chest to push the sound into his heart. “There, I’ll keep that there for when I’m sad.”
“Ah, Chunnie-ah, if you need someone to keep your heart free of sadness…” Junsu brushed the edge of Micky’s nose with his fingertips, running down over the other’s mouth and over the set of his chin. “I’ll always be here to do that.”
“You and the others.” Yoochun agreed with a nod. “Jaejoong is good at doing that too. Different, but just as good.”
Junsu gritted at the idea of Jaejoong bringing any emotion to Yoochun’s heart, his own clutching hard just at the thought of someone brushing on Yoochun’s feelings besides him. Yunho spoke of jealousy, a hot streak of verdant burning through his thoughts but the wildfire of rage flared, dampened by the seductive smile Micky wrapped around Junsu’s soul.
It stung. Deep and barbed… that smile latched poisoned nettles into Junsu’s desire. It left a kiss of black mist amid the sweetness, a haunting ghost of what could be between them. Junsu tilted his head, pressing the feel of Yoochun along the side of his body. He met Yunho’s eyes around Micky’s shoulder, the leader’s gaze catching the skipping emotions on Junsu’s face.
Changmin’s triumphant shout echoed in the stairwell, the propped open door funneling his jubilation into the cold night air. Yoochun grinned at their youngest member as he stumbled over the elders’ sprawled forms, long legs easily clearing their tangled limbs. Yunho playfully yelled a warning at the youth, covering Jaejoong’s head with his palm. Jae yelped, biting at his lover’s chest with a nip of sharp teeth, lightly telling Yunho he didn’t care to be abused.
“Ah, time to chew on your mistakes.” Yoochun lightly pushed Junsu from his shoulder, his hand lingering on the young man’s hip, a brush of fingers along the silk of Junsu’s exposed back. “Changmin will want to show you the stars.”
Walking backwards, a gleeful wicked grin spread over his face, Junsu winked at his roommate and said. “If you let me, Chunnie-ah, I’d show you some stars...”
“Hah!” Yoochun shook his head in mock disgust. “You’d try to convince me that there is a giraffe eating ice cream in the canopy. I don’t need any help with my astronomy, Susu. I can find what I need just fine.”
Junsu chewed at the corner of his mouth, a rare thoughtfulness edging into his cocky expression. “Maybe you just don’t know what you need yet, Yoochun. I can help you with that too.”
“He’s driving me insane, Hyuk.” Junsu paced across the empty studio floor.
The other singer looked up from his perusal of CDs the other brought in, a bootleg Gackt. EunHyuk stretched his legs out, working his feet into tight circles as he opened the CD case, reading the song list before answering. “Are we talking about Kim Jaejoong or Park Yoochun? Lately, either one of those seems responsible for your ill humour.”
“Please, no mentioning Jaejoong.” The tenor growled, rounding off his stride and headed back to his oldest friend, the other singer’s body reflected in the wall-length mirror. “Jae is all I hear these days. He’s driven me insane and now I am on my return trip.”
“My name is Jae...” EunHyuk reminded Junsu, adding the CD to the pile he wanted to rip to his music player. “And he shares his music with you. He can’t be that bad.”
“Hah! Shares his music.” Junsu wrinkled his nose, his changeable face softening. “He shares. Everything. And we share back. Sometimes we’re even allowed to borrow things that we bought in the first place.”
“So we are talking about Jaejoong.” The young man picked up the hot tea he’d brought in, removing the plastic lid and blowing at the torrent of steam in his face.
“No.” The tenor said with a shake of his head. “We’re talking about Yoochun. He’s the one that’s driving me insane.”
Lee Hyuk Jae was familiar with the frantic pacing of his friend’s energetic body, the bundled power of his emotions translated into the strides and fierce stops Junsu poured over the wooden floor. Much of the sweat on his friend’s brow came from the fury of his emotions, his body leanly carved and conditioned for long battles with itself. It was the emotional terrain that Junsu forged fearlessly through, a rocky landscape he normally found smooth and unhindered by any obstacle. Between them, they’d cut a swath through the pretty offerings in school and in the halls of SM Entertainment. Junsu’s frustration amused Hyuk to no end, the agreeable mischief-maker he’d befriended in his youth finally stymied by a reluctant charmer.
Coiled with tension, Junsu’s body line was something to admire, EunHyuk’s attention fully on his friend’s taut legs and back. They’d tangled with one another a few times, the attempts often dissolving into fits of giggles followed by hiccups neither could suppress. Charismatic, Junsu proved to be the perfect companion for the amiable EunHyuk, the boys bonding even tighter as they were taken through the rigorous training that left them both exhausted and begging for surcease.
“Ah, Yoochun.” Hyuk nodded as if he knew exactly what Junsu was talking about, although the singer gave up trying to understand his friend’s attraction to his band mate. “What has he done now? Or is it what he’s not doing?”
“It’s...” Junsu stopped short, staring out into the room. He couldn’t put his finger on the one thing Yoochun was doing to drive him insane. The subtle hints of his growing attraction didn’t seem to sink into the baritone’s thoughts nor the overt flirting and touching he’d escalated to. Instead, Yoochun continued along his obtuse, endearing way...always friendly, giving and loving... just out of reach of a kiss or the tantalizing touch of his body against Junsu’s.
“It’s everything.” Junsu sighed, grinding his teeth in frustration.
“Careful.” Hyuk exclaimed in joy at a copy of Hyde 666 buried in a stack of loose CDs. Checking the back for scratches, he didn’t see the poisonous glare Junsu directed towards him. “Your mother paid a lot of money to ensure you had good teeth. If you ruin them now, she’ll liable to beat you and the group will have to find another singer. Wait, never mind...go ahead, grind your teeth. I get tired of being one of thirteen. I could take your place and live with Yoochun.”
“Don’t even think about it.” Junsu appeared suddenly at Hyuk’s feet, a dangerous gleam in his eyes. Growling, the singer crouched in front of his friend, tapping Hyuk on the nose to get his attention. “I have enough problems with him crawling all over Jaejoong. If Yunho does one thing for me in my life, it would be to keep Joongie away from Yoochun long enough for him to miss being touched...and I can...”
“You can take Jaejoong’s place?” The other young man leaned forward, unafraid of his friend’s posturing display of temper. “What’s wrong with just a few kisses and groping in the dark? What are you looking for? Something forever like Yunho and Jaejoong?”
“No, I can’t...” Junsu slid down onto the worn floor to sit besides his oldest friend. “I don’t want to spend my life chained down to one person. I can’t imagine Chunnie would want that either. He’s a worse flirt than I am. It’s just that I want him so badly. There are nights when I just lay there while he sleeps and it’s all I can do not to slide over his body, tasting his mouth.”
“So just ask him.” Hyuk shrugged, bumping his shoulder against Junsu. “Of course, unless you want all of this teasing to go to waste. He’s got to be curious. He’s let you ride all over him, Junnie-ah. How much more obvious do you need to be other that telling him you want him?”
“Suppose it goes bad?” Junsu worried at his cuticle, dampening the end of his thumb. “I can’t risk it. Not with Yoochun.”
“Ah but you could risk it with me?” The other singer balled up his fist and lightly struck his friend, a playful tap just hard enough to push at Junsu’s body.
“I told him I didn’t know anything about... that kind of thing.” Junsu widened his eyes in mock surprise at Hyuk’s open-mouthed shock. “It’s not as if I’m a wanton whore like you. I just... am more experienced than he is.”
“And you led him to believe you know nothing about...” Hyuk hissed his displeasure. “You shouldn’t lie to him. Even if he’s dense in the head, he’s one of your best friends. And the object of your lust. He might be more... approachable if he knew that you had an idea about how things worked between... men.”
“I wasn’t sure how he felt about... all of that.” Junsu waved his hand, dismissing the whole matter. “And then... Jaejoong and Yunho happened, right under our noses. Yoochun was in the middle of it, cooing and petting Jae while Yunho stalked around the edges, snarling at everyone who came near. I thought I was going to lose my head or throw up from the sweetness when they finally did something about it.”
“So this ... thing... with Yunho and Jaejoong...it’s real then?” The other ventured, the CDs forgotten around him.
“Yes.” Junsu nodded. “They... fit into each other. Sometimes rubbing raw but still, together. It’s like their souls were soldered together with gold and melted into a single ring. And Yoochun polishes it, just around Jaejoong’s side mostly. I think Yunho is still a bit fierce towards him. There was a lot of jealousy from that corner.”
“Then you should take advantage of that.” Hyuk nodded knowingly. “Yunho is an ally you should court. If anyone has an interest in fostering Yoochun’s affections towards someone other than Kim Jaejoong, it would be him.”
“That’s a good idea.” Junsu replied, musing over how the leader could help him peel Jaejoong from Yoochun’s side. “Just remember, you can’t say anything to anyone about Yunho and Jaejoong. I only told you because well... “
“We’re the oldest of friends.” Hyuk patted at his best friend’s shoulder, looping an arm around Junsu’s torso. “Besides, it’s not like I’m blind. Everyone can see them and know something is there. You’d have to be an idiot not to see what is between them.”
“See, that’s what I don’t understand.” The tenor bit back his exasperation. “Micky comforted Jaejoong during the whole mess and he doesn’t see what I want from him?”
“Maybe he only is looking for love, Junnie-ah.” The other hugged his friend tight, a voice of reason amid the chaos in Junsu’s thoughts. “Perhaps Yoochun doesn’t see the lust in your heart because he wants to see something else instead.”
“That’s not there, Yuki-ah.” Junsu sighed heavily, leaning into his friend’s warmth. “I don’t want forever. It’s not for me. I don’t need to have the kind of passion that YunJae have. That’s...too much of the other in your soul. How can they even breathe without feeling strangled by the other? No, that’s not for me.”